Finding My Way Back to Me

Well, Gorgeous Glam Girls its been almost a year since I last posted. Where have I been? What have I been up to?? Finding my way back to me. (It took you a year, girl???!!) Yes, it's taken me a year, and I'm still not quite there yet, but everyday is better then the last thanks be to God.

:-)

In the past year I've been dealing with serious writers block, non-focus, faith that was moving mountains, to faith (doubt actually) that couldn't move an empty soda can; the lost of my beautiful nephew, the self-reflection period that started out as 6 months fasting from men, until Dr. Perry told me that sounded angry lumberjack jacket wearing chick in the making (your girl all but sprinted across Borders from a table of handsome intelligent looking black men that were studying together last September), and turned to focusing on me and what I want out of life & how not to make the same mistakes again.

After assuring Malika there would be a birthday post, I couldn't come up with a thing to write. Here I am 3 weeks after turning 29 ready to try this blogging thing again. I said previously I wanted to be transparent here and share with my Glam Divas the things I've been through that may encourage you, or just give you a good laugh. :-) Whatever may be on my mind or heart. Expect the occasional product, site, or boutique review also. Thanks for your patience as I Find my way back to me, Dolls.

What I mean by finding my way back to me? How do you seperate from yourself? I'm sure all of you at some point in your life have found yourself so busy going through the motions of life that you're not even LIVING LIFE but Existing day to day. My friend Judy calls it, "survival mode." There have been so many times when I literally feel like I walked outside of my job only to turn & walk right back into the doors. Although I've been gone since yesterday & sometimes since last Friday. Not really taking time to just be grateful and enjoy the the things & people you love. Over the past couple of years I've lost the parts of me that I enjoy & love to busy focusing on other people their stuff & what they thought I should be. I lost the part of me that loved taking pictures, dressing up and doing my make up just because. The me that loved to do creative projects whether making t-shirts, jewelry or just sketching. The me that would walk all over the city now barely leaves her home once she's there. (When your nail tech calls you anti-social, there might be a problem.)

Speaking of my home it just dawned on me last weekend while in Bed, Bath & Beyond that I've been using it as a sleeping /storage space rather then a home where friends and family are welcomed and my creative haven from the world. I don't have to compromise with a darn soul its all me what I love, what I want, what I love. On the real I had been living (in this certain area) like I was still a relationship that I ended 3 yrs ago. Physically I had put this person out of my world, but yet mentally I was still holding myself in bondage to this situation that God freed me from before I even moved into my home. Yes, I am aware it sounds weird to most of you reading this, but there is someone out there that is doing the same thing at this moment in some other area of her life and this is for her. Find your way back to the real you, the one that loved and enjoyed the life you have been blessed with. Take your life back ladies (or discover it for the first time) you only get one. Love you, Dolls!

xoxo

Mor